


Hey, stranger! (I want you to catch me like a cold)

by jstbjoyful



Category: NCT (Band), Seven O'Clock (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Falling In Love, Fluff, M/M, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers, doctor!hangyeom, gamer!kun, getting better, i can't write, love as a remedy, pizza boy!jungwoo, rich!kun, trigger warning - mentions of food disorder, trigger warning - mentions of mental health issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-13
Updated: 2018-05-13
Packaged: 2019-05-06 05:18:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14634897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jstbjoyful/pseuds/jstbjoyful
Summary: Kun is easily overwhelmed, especially when the cutest pizza delivery man is involved.





	Hey, stranger! (I want you to catch me like a cold)

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!   
> Here is another (not so) great addition to the kunwoo tag on ao3. I feel like there aren't enough fanfictions for them ,, maybe that's why i keep wanting to write kunwoo aus ... who know.
> 
> Anyway, this is deeper than usual with mental health issues involved (mostly depression but it's never clearly mentioned) for both characters, even though Kun has more issues than Jungwoo in this I think? It might be a little "love as a remedy" for both of them.
> 
> Before I go off topic, please remember that English is not my first language! I know it's not really an excuse to poorly-written aus but ,,, yeah it still feels a little weird to write so much in English, and I hope there aren't too many mistakes in this, as it isn't beta'd.
> 
> Enjoy!

Kun was lazy. He never got anything done in his house (or for university) because he would sit and play video games all day. Since he lived alone, in a small apartment next to his university, no one could tell him to clean everything up, or to eat healthily, or to wash up more than once every two days. He didn’t have anything else to do, anyway. Since he spoke in a broken Korean, no one would understand him, and he gave up trying making friends. No, the only thing that mattered was to keep an average grade and to become the number one in this stupid video game.

That’s why he didn’t understand the need that took over him to clean his whole apartment up on a Sunday at five am. He did it anyway and thought he should use what was left of the day to study. He took his backpack and stuffed it with what he wanted to do at the library, then he left his place.

It only took him ten minutes to arrive at the library that has just opened. When he arrived, he caught a glimpse of what he swore was the most beautiful boy he has ever seen. He shook his head and went straight to the back of the library to find his spot – a small table with two chairs and nothing but old books about subjects that didn’t interest anybody around. And he spent a few hours, like this, reading his notes and scribbling down what he thought was important. He had finished his Chinese homework within minutes – the perks of being Chinese – and then went on to work for his law and philosophy class. This was much, much harder, since the classes were taught in Korean. He wasn’t that bad at Korean, he could easily talk and write, but he was lacking in vocabulary, and couldn’t understand when people talked fast. Luckily, someone in his class uploaded after each class his notes on the Facebook group of the students studying in this university that specific year. With the help of a translator he downloaded on his phone, he could understand what was said.

He tried to ignore his rumbling stomach for hours until it got too much, so he left his belongings on the table (since no one came here, it wouldn’t be a problem) and went to the vending machine to get a chocolate bar and a soda. He ripped off the paper around the bar and started munching while going back to his table – where a pretty boy was sitting. Kun looked around blankly, not really knowing what to do. The pretty boy from earlier was reading his notes and was writing something on his notebook, and he seemed that he didn’t even notice Kun was standing there. He waited a few more seconds because the pretty boy (how many times had he called him “pretty boy” in his head already? He made a mental note to ask his name as soon as possible) was correcting a word before fake-coughing, which startled the other one.

“Oh my- you surprised me.” Pretty boy said while putting his right hand on his heart, probably to check his pulse.

“Uh … sorry.” Kun replied while scratching the back of his neck. “If you don’t mind I’d like to start working again.”

“Ah, sure. I was just correcting a few words, because you misspelled them, it’s no problem though. You have a nice handwriting. And uh- thanks for using my notes to study. I guess. It’s nice to see people actually study them. Sorry, I’m rambling. I should go.” Said he while standing up.

“Actually … if you don’t have anything to do-“

“You want me to help you study? Sure!” Pretty boy interrupted Kun and sat down again. He looked up eagerly and patted the other chair he had just pulled up next to him. “Come sit here!” He said excitedly.

“Thank you.” Whispered shyly Kun. 

“No problem. I don’t have anything better to do before I start my shift at work, anyway. And you seem like you need a little bit of help. But your Korean sounds good though? It doesn’t add up.”

“I just lack specific vocabulary.”

“I see. Well as you can see here-“

Kun started to listen attentively to everything the other boy said, but he didn’t quite catch his name yet, and that was a bother to him. And, as the puppy-like boy was explaining something about Marx’s work, Kun suddenly said: “Can you tell me your name … Like … What’s your name?” and this made the other boy giggle when he replied softly “Jungwoo”. 

Another hour went by with Jungwoo explaining in basic Korean every aspect of the class Kun didn’t understand, and when Jungwoo had to go to work, he left with the promise to tutor Kun every time the older one would need it – and he gave him his phone number.

+

Kun was back to his place after studying for a day and he felt drained out of energy. He didn’t have such a productive day in a while and was about to pass out on his bed when his stomach kicked in again and started rumbling, reminding him that all he had to eat was a chocolate bar. Too lazy to go out to a restaurant or buy ramen or even cook something with what was left in his refrigerator, he decided to order a pizza. He turned his computer on and went on the website of his favorite pizza place to order. He was checking his cart when he saw that they added a boy to fill in with special requests, and since he was feeling bold from his meeting with Jungwoo, he typed in “send your cutest delivery man”. He decided to take a nap instead of doing nothing for at least half an hour, and he quickly dozed off on his bed.

He was woken up by the doorbell. He checked his phone to see that it had already been 40 minutes since he had ordered, so it could only be the pizza delivery guy. He secretly wished that they really sent their cutest delivery man, because he could have used some eye candy right at this moment. He went to hold the door and nearly chocked on his own spit when he saw Jungwoo, standing there in a red uniform, hair in a mess from the helmet he had just taken off, a box of pizza in his hands.   
“Hi.” Kun whispered. Jungwoo laughed. 

“You look tired. You should sleep a little.”

“I’m-I’m going to. After I eat this pizza, I mean.”

Jungwoo nodded, and they looked at each other for a few seconds, neither speaking. Kun took in Jungwoo’s appearance and wondered how he could make the stupid red and yellow uniform work – maybe that was his advantage, as the prettiest person in the world.

“You look good.” 

It slipped out of Kun’s tongue, before he even realized it, and he was about to apologize when Jungwoo blushed and started giggling. Kun decided that this was his new favorite sound, and he wanted to hear Jungwoo giggle again, and again, and he wanted to make him blush again as well.

“I’m usually polite and reply that the other person looks good as well, but I don’t want to lie to you. You really look like a mess right now.” Jungwoo looked down and pouted. “You should really go to sleep.”

How can I go to sleep when I want to look at you for as long as I can? Kun thought, but he couldn’t say that – he’d sound like a creep. “I will go to sleep.”

“You promise me? Pinky promise?” Jungwoo held out his free pinky, waiting for Kun to intertwine it with his own, which he did. “Yeah, pinky promise.”

Jungwoo handed out the box to Kun who took it, still looking at the younger one. “I have to go back to work, but you should text me tomorrow. We could hang out, if you want to.”

“Yeah, it sounds good.” Kun smiled, but it did not quite reach his eyes.

“Oh, before I go. Was your request filled? Am I the cutest delivery guy?” Jungwoo smirked – how could he smirk with such an angelic face? It was Kun’s turn to blush, if one could call it blush. His cheeks were bright red and felt like they caught fire. Kun bowed his head so Jungwoo couldn’t see, and he mumbled “You are.” 

Jungwoo giggled again before bidding Kun goodbye and asking him to go to sleep as soon as he was done eating. But Kun couldn’t even remember being tired, and he sighed before locking the door to his apartment and eating a slice of his favorite pizza. 

+

He went on with his life the next day. Not doing anything, playing video games all day and munching on cold pizza to avoid being hungry. He was still too lazy to go grocery shopping and even lazier to try to study – he already did so much the day just before … He took a few naps and went to sleep early, not caring about anything else. He was lucky not to have any class on Monday – it was just a hassle to go through a day full of classes on a Monday.

On Tuesday, he was less lucky. He had to wake up before seven am to get to his first class of the day. He wasn’t properly awoken and had to rub the sleep from his eyes a few times before he deemed it useless, so he splashed cold water onto his face instead. He rushed to the university to grab a small breakfast from the convenience store next to the law building, that was where he was headed anyway.

In the lecture room, he sat at his usual spot, at the very back and kept his head down so that no one would come and talk to him. 

After two hours of lecture, he picked up his computer and his bag and tried to pack as quickly as possible to go to his next lecture. He was about to leave the room when he saw Jungwoo looking at him, a frown on his face. After a few seconds, Jungwoo shook his head and started talking to someone and he got up the stairs. He approached Kun, and the latter made a movement to talk to him - it was useless, Jungwoo ignored him.

Kun knew, right there, as he watched Jungwoo get away from him, that he fucked up already, and he couldn’t help but feel guilty. Worse, his heart felt like it has just been broken into tiny pieces. Just because he had forgotten to text Jungwoo.

He didn’t know Jungwoo could hold a grudge over something as simple as this, but he made up his mind during his next lecture. He was going to get Jungwoo back - if he could even say « back » as they never were a thing, acquaintances as best.

+

Kun figured Jungwoo would keep on ignoring him after a few days. He would show up to Jungwoo’s face with two warm coffees and Jungwoo wouldn’t even spare him a glance as he started chatting with his friends, walking away from Kun - he saw Jungwoo’s friends apologize with small bows behind his back. Kun ended up giving up going to class this day and both coffees to a homeless man he saw every day on his way home.

He tried a second time to talk to Jungwoo. He waited for him at the end of their law lecture and grabbed his wrist. “Jungwoo? Can we talk, please?” the smaller one just shook his wrist off of Kun’s grip and said “No.” before walking away once more.  
The third time, Kun texted Jungwoo. He didn’t know how he hadn’t thought about this before. He sent a dozen of texts before Jungwoo blocked his number - he knew his number was blocked because his texts wouldn’t even go through, a small red exclamation mark showing up beside his text instead of a “delivered” mark.

All of his efforts were in vain, and he just felt sorry toward Jungwoo. He didn’t have anything to explain - he just wanted the younger to know he was sorry.

Next thing he did was deliver gifts to Jungwoo. If he didn’t want to talk or see Kun, the older one was going to be smarter than that. He found out Jungwoo’s address through one of his friend and sent him a bouquet of flowers first. It was a mix of pink and purple flowers - colors that reminded him of Jungwoo’s pretty face. After this, he payed for a delivery on-campus so that Jungwoo would receive a box of chocolate in front of him. Jungwoo took the box and shoved him into his bag, ignoring Kun’s stare.  
He kept on sending gifts to Jungwoo, but two weeks later, they still weren’t on speaking terms, and it was confusing to Kun. He didn’t know what to feel for Jungwoo. Should he give up already? Was Jungwoo playing hard to get? One thing Kun knew was that he wanted to know Jungwoo - the short time they had spent together made him strongly believe that they could be good together.

All his efforts were useless, but he couldn’t give up just yet - so he tried to come up with a new idea. It didn’t take long for him to think about something new, and he cursed himself for not having this idea sooner. He opened his laptop and logged into his pizzeria account to place an order. When he checked out he wrote on the small request box “send your cutest delivery man” and checked the option to pay when he’d be delivered. And he waited.

Half an hour later he heard faint knocks on his door and he ran to open it. On the other side was Jungwoo, in his red uniform, dark circles under his eyes. Kun wanted to reach out and ruffle his hair, maybe cuddle him to sleep.

“Jungwoo” Kun whispered.

“Your total is fifteen dollars.” Said the shorter boy, avoiding eye contact by keeping his eyes on Kun’s chest. 

“Listen to me, please.”

“Do you want to pay by card?”

“Yes- but please, listen, I’m sorry, Jungwoo. I didn’t mean to give you the impression that I was ignoring you. I’m just really bad at things like this. I do care about you.” Kun handed his card to Jungwoo, who inserted it in the machine without a word.

“Let me fix this, give me a second chance, maybe.” Kun pleaded. “I wasn’t ignoring you, I mean it. I get overwhelmed by simple tasks.” He typed his code and Jungwoo gave him his receipt.

“Good night, sir. Enjoy your pizza” 

Jungwoo left.

+

Kun decided to order pizzas as much as he could to see Jungwoo, who was still giving him the cold shoulder. Money wasn’t even the problem for Kun, since he didn’t do anything besides order pizzas these days, he could afford it – and honestly, his family was so rich that they wouldn’t even care if Kun went overboard with the food. 

He was sad when Jungwoo wasn’t the one to deliver his pizza, and he’d ask whoever gave it to him if Jungwoo was doing well. He just felt that he had to give up on Jungwoo, since the other one had been deeply hurt by him – and he stopped ordering pizzas to try to talk to him. At university, he ignored him, just like the other had been doing for the past weeks. 

It was hard for him to suppress his feelings, and to ignore the fact that he had developed a huge crush on Jungwoo as he was ignoring him. But he did it anyway, because that’s what Jungwoo wanted, and he couldn’t force Jungwoo into liking him. It wasn’t right, and Kun just thought it would save them both the heartbreak when Kun would go back to China at the end of the year. That was new – Kun had ringed his father to tell him he was going to go study in China for his last year, and that he would just work for him afterwards, just like his father wanted. He had no reason to stay in Korea for another year – no friends, no boyfriends, no nothing. He kept doing what he used to do – play video games all day, eat only when necessary and study from time to time.   
It was his last lecture before winter break and he just couldn’t focus. 

The teacher’s voice was ringing in his ears, but his words didn’t make sense, and Kun felt his eyes lose their power to accommodate. He was soon staring into the void, feeling as if his mind was somewhere else than this room. Then he felt a hand on his shoulder, it was warm and pleasant, but his mind didn’t react, he was still lost and felt so relaxed that he wished to stay like this forever, until a more familiar voice started tingling his brain. He turned his head toward the source of the noise, but his face was still blank. In front of him, Jungwoo was waving his hand in his face and talking, but Kun couldn’t hear anything. So Jungwoo took both of his shoulders with his hands and shook Kun until the older boy said his name. 

“Yeah, yeah, it’s me. Oh my God I was so scared, why did you do that?”

“Do what?”

“This, you were staring at the wall and- and you stayed like this even though the lecture had finished almost twenty minutes ago and- I was so scared you were dying.” A single tear rolled down Jungwoo’s left eye. Kun reached with his thumb and wiped the tear off the younger’s cheek. 

“I’m sorry.” Kun said. He was already feeling less numb. 

“Why would you be? You were... dissociating. It’s not your fault.”

Kun repeated “I’m sorry.” and Jungwoo kissed the top of his head. 

“No need to be. I was dumb, and my desperate need of immediate attention got the best of me. I should be the one to say sorry for making you do all those efforts and getting nothing in return when all I wanted was to hang out with you all along.” Jungwoo shook his head before saying “Sorry.” 

Kun wanted to speak but his mouth wouldn’t obey to his desperate pleas. 

“Kun, I- yeah I’m sorry. Really, believe me. It might be a lot to take in but I’m sorry. You probably felt terrible, and you spent so much money on me, so I felt awful too. But- yeah. It’s hard for me to not feel special immediately for someone and ... Ah, I know you said you get overwhelmed by simple tasks, but my pride got the best of me.”

Kun nodded. He managed to stutter “O-okay.”. 

“Am I too late? Do you not want me anymore? I’m an idiot, I shouldn’t have-“

“No, I was trying to forget you. But I just couldn’t. There’s something about you that made me chase you, so I’m- I’m willing to give us a chance.” Kun couldn’t understand how his mouth was speaking so fast, and without needing his brain to think. It felt weird, but he ignored that feeling.

Jungwoo broke into a big smile, and another tear rolled from his right eye. He threw himself on Kun and hugged him tight. The seated boy could feel Jungwoo’s warmth and he smiled - he smiled so hard his eyes closed themselves. They stayed like this for a few seconds, even if it was uncomfortable, until Jungwoo pulled away and said: “So... do you want to take me out on a date?”

+

Somehow, his eyes were closed, and he opened them with great difficulty. He groaned when he did because of the blinding white light just above him and closed his eyes again. He opened his eyes again and sit on the bed he was laying on. He saw the door open, and Jungwoo enter.

"You're awake." He said, and Kun didn't know what to respond, so he nodded. "I was really afraid, you fainted out of nowhere."

"Fainted?” Kun tried to say, but it came out more as a croak. His throat felt dry, and Jungwoo handed him a glass of water that he chugged in a second. He tried to speak again after coughing a little. “Fainted? When?"

"Well, I went up to you after our class ended and when you saw me you fainted ..." Jungwoo trailed off. The atmosphere was awkward, and a few seconds went by without the both of them speaking. Jungwoo still didn’t move out of his spot, and Kun just wanted to ask him to sit down.

"Oh- okay. Uh, so, where are we?" Kun asked without looking at Jungwoo.

"Just at the university hospital. The students in medicine tested you, you're suffering of undernutrition. You're not eating?" Jungwoo already knew, and Kun suddenly felt ashamed. It’s not that he didn’t eat – he ate sometimes, a few boxes of instant ramen or chocolate bars, he just didn’t have meals … on a regular basis.

"I-" He tried to reply, his head falling low. Jungwoo interrupted him. "You stopped ordering pizzas. Is this why you're not eating anymore?"

"I couldn't bother to. I wasn't hungry." Kun mumbled, and he hoped that Jungwoo heard him because he couldn’t find it in him to repeat what he just confessed. 

"Kun ..." Jungwoo was staring at him, arms crossed. Kun didn't reply, things were going to fast in his head and- fuck, he had a headache.

During the small silence that fell between them, as the both waited for a doctor to come and check up on Kun, the latter remembered the dream he just had. Everything felt right in that dream, they were finally apologizing (and Kun realized they both owned apologies to the other) and they were finally about to be together. It made Kun’s heart flutter, because as much as he tried to forget about Jungwoo to save himself the heartache, he just couldn’t – when he closed his eyes, the first thing he saw was Jungwoo’s face. When he tried to sleep, his brain made him imagine all sorts of scenarios involving Jungwoo, his puppy-like attitude and they lips coming together in messy but cute kisses. Kun wanted to cry – and he silently did, not minding Jungwoo’s presence in the room, and since the other boy was seated and busying himself on his phone, he had the small liberty to shed a few tears.

The door quickly opened, and a man wearing a white blouse came in. Kun couldn’t help but admire his face and appearance, but he quickly remembered that he was crying just seconds before, so he wiped his tears with the back of his hand. He never saw a doctor this good-looking, and he had to admit that the fact that this was (his) doctor made him feel better. At least someone would pay attention to him, not like Jungwoo who was giving him the cold shoulder (although Jungwoo still cared for Kun, if he took him to the hospital … Kun’s mind was a mess). 

“Hello, Kun! I’m Doctor Song, but you can call me Hangyeom. I just graduated med school to be honest, so it still feels weird to be called “Doctor Song”. Anyway. I’m sure your friend told you already, but you’re suffering of undernutrition and extreme fatigue. We injected you some nutriments through the IV so that you’ll make it for the rest of the day, but it just helps keeping your blood healthy. Do you understand?” Kun was looking right at the Doctor’s face, but something was off inside of his brain. He found him attractive, but he could focus on his words just right – it wasn’t like Jungwoo, who made him lose all connection with the real world.

“Yes …” He replied with a small voice.

“This means that we aren’t going to keep you here, but I recommend that you go see a therapist. When you get discharged at the reception, please show them this paper.” He scribbled of a pink piece of paper and handed it to Kun. “They will give you an appointment with the hospital’s therapist, just so that they can evaluate whether you need to have a regular therapist or not. Also, you have to eat three meals a day.” Hangyeom turned himself to look at Jungwoo. “You should make sure he eats those three meals a day, and maybe you should treat him to a little restaurant just now?” He winked and Jungwoo blushed while nodding. Kun couldn’t help but feel jealous.

“Then you’re free to go! Have a good evening, and I hope I don’t see you again!” Hangyeom said with a big smile before leaving the room. A nurse came and took the IV off Kun’s arm while talking to him, completely ignoring Jungwoo, who was glaring daggers at her. She was being extra-touchy and smiling more than necessary, which made Kun scoff a little, but he still appreciated the attention. After a small exchange she wished him to get better soon and left (Kun was surprised she didn’t make a further move to ask for his phone number but he was thankful she didn’t, otherwise it would have been awkward for him).

He got up the bed, still in his hospital gown and Jungwoo blushed. “I’ll leave you to get changed.” Kun nodded and put his clothes on very quickly. He wanted to get out, the clean and pristine atmosphere of the hospital getting on his nerves. He took his bag, placed at the foot of the bed and left the room. “Let’s go.” Said Jungwoo who was waiting on the other side of the door.

+

Jungwoo indeed took him to a restaurant after Kun was discharged. Kun felt awkward, since they weren’t really talking, and he only wanted to leave. Well – he didn’t want to leave, he wanted to be with Jungwoo, but not like this. He wanted to hold his hand and kiss his neck, not look down to his bowl of rice that Jungwoo was slowly filling with meat while trying to distract himself.

“You should eat, Kun.” The other said with what seemed to be a stern voice. “Otherwise I’ll be the one to feed you.” 

Kun looked up in surprise, and Jungwoo was looking at him with a soft smile on his face. He turned the small barbeque off and took a bite of meat with his chopsticks, directing it towards Kun’s mouth. “Open.” Kun obeyed and let Jungwoo dispose it on his tongue. It was hot, but not enough to burn, and Kun chewed a little. It was good – there was no denying. It was cooked enough to not disgust him, and he finally swallowed after a few seconds of chewing. Jungwoo took another bite of meat from Kun’s bowl of rice and repeated his actions a few times. 

“You should eat too.” Kun said after a while, and Jungwoo smiled again, a soft “Okay” coming out from his mouth, and he started to chew on a bite of meat as well. Kun fed himself while watching Jungwoo – the dim light of the restaurant made him glow, as if he was the biggest source of light in the room, his cheeks glistening from the sweat the heat of the barbeque had created. He was in his most natural form, without makeup, small bags under his eyes and … red in his eyes. Kun wondered if he had cried, when he fainted. Did Jungwoo cared about Kun like he did in his dream? He hoped so. But he told himself he wouldn’t be the one to make the first move, since Jungwoo had denied his feelings so many times.

Kun was busying himself with his rice when Jungwoo talked. “I’m sorry for ignoring you, by the way. That wasn’t cool.” Kun swallowed and looked at Jungwoo – he didn’t know what to reply. Should he say “it’s okay”, or “it doesn’t matter”? That would be lying. It wasn’t okay, and it did matter to Kun. He felt as if he had just broken up with Jungwoo, for fuck’s sake. His face was blank, not betraying any of his thoughts.

“It just- I’m kind of weird. I like when I have lots of attention. And when you promised you would send me a text, I really thought that we could like … go on a date. So, it hurt when I didn’t receive anything, and my attention-whore side got the best of me. I guess. I felt like I had to ignore you to make you feel what I felt, but then you started ordering pizzas every day and it was so hard to see you, and I couldn’t even apologize because I was scared.” He breathed, and Kun wondered if Jungwoo was about to cry, because he was about to cry. “So, I quit my job at the pizza place. I told them I had to focus on my studies, but truth is I needed the money, so they took me back after that, and I made them promise not to send me to your place anymore, no matter how many times you asked for the cutest delivery guy.” Jungwoo drunk a glass of water, maybe to calm himself. It was nerve-wrecking for the both of them, Kun not knowing what to do to make Jungwoo feel better, Jungwoo not knowing why he was telling Kun all of this.  
“Then you sent the gifts, and I really thought I should apologize to you. But … my pride wouldn’t let me. My insecurities wouldn’t let me. I thought “what if he’s doing this now, but then forget about me?”. You know, I really … I really have this problem with attention and I need it. It’s not that I want it, I need it. I crave it. And if I don’t have attention, I feel like I’m dying. I was about to apologize because I- I needed your attention. Not in the way that I need it just to feel alive, it’s just that, whenever I saw you looking at me, my heart would be super fast and whenever I close my eyes I see you. I want to give you all of my attention, if you promise to give me yours. You get how I feel?” Kun nodded. He knew – oh how he knew how Jungwoo felt.

“It’s stupid that I got this crush on you so fast. But I don’t want to go against it anymore, so if you want to give me a second chance, maybe we could try to … see each other. Like, go on dates and hang out and see how it goes.”

Kun was at a loss for words. He wanted that, he wanted to hang out with Jungwoo and he wanted to pet his hair and he wanted to give him all of his attention, if that’s what Jungwoo wanted. He wanted to please the younger, and he wanted to feel safe with him, and he wanted Jungwoo to feel the same way around. But he didn’t know how to express that, he didn’t know how to tell Jungwoo how he felt, that was hard, too hard for him. At least right now, maybe two weeks ago that wouldn’t have been a problem – but now it was hard. Especially knowing he made the decision to go back to China in a few months. That was an issue that he could easily solve if he wanted to. Therefore, he breathed, and tried to calm himself.

“I would like that, Jungwoo. I’m sorry I can’t give you what you just gave me. This whole speech about your feelings. I really appreciate that you trust me enough to tell me all of this but I-“

“I know, Kun. There’s no need to rush. We can take our time. Take all the time you need before talking to me about your feelings, okay?” 

Kun was so grateful, and his heart felt like it was about to explode. How was Jungwoo so comprehensive? He didn’t know, but it felt just like it was supposed to be. So Kun smile, it didn’t reach his eyes, but it was right for him to smile. 

+

“Are you going to be okay?” Jungwoo asked. Not letting go of Kun’s hand.

It was the day of Kun’s appointment with the hospital therapist. It would last for as long as they deemed necessary, and that appeased Kun’s mind a little. He didn’t know what would come out of this, but he knew he wanted to get better. That’s also why he started eating regularly, with or without Jungwoo, and that he had been going grocery shopping often for the past few weeks. 

“Yeah. Don’t worry.” He said while looking directly at Jungwoo’s eyes. That was another improvement he had made these past few weeks – he finally looked at people in the eyes and held their gaze. It didn’t feel intimidating anymore, instead it felt like something he had to do. 

Jungwoo nodded and let Kun’s hand go. He was patient with him, he knew he needed time and he knew that he was really trying his best, for himself, but also for Jungwoo. Jungwoo was nothing but supportive, and that made Kun want to get even better. And Kun was also helping Jungwoo with his attention issue.

Jungwoo was starting to understand that people could care about him and not give him attention all the time. He was also starting to understand that the world wasn’t out to get him, and that nobody wanted to hurt him – who would want to hurt him, with his puppy-like face?

“Then I’ll get going. If you need me to pick you up just call me, hm?”

Kun nodded and Jungwoo pecked his forehead. Kun blushed, but his face remained stoic – that didn’t affect Jungwoo. Now he knew. Kun nodded again and Jungwoo left, waving at him down the corridor. 

 

+

Kun started seeing a therapist on a weekly basis. It felt weird at first, having to reply to all those questions, having to say how he felt and such. He never did that – he was never asked to do that in his family. In China, he just had to sit and be quiet. He had to do well at school, and never bother his parents with anything, otherwise they would yell at him.

Two months went by, and he could already feel the great influence those sessions had on him. The first time he knew he was really getting better was when he called Jungwoo “baby.”

It happened as they were on his couch, watching a movie while munching on popcorn. The name slipped out when Kun wanted more popcorn – he said “baby can you make some more, please?”. It came out naturally out of his mouth, but Jungwoo was surprised. They hadn’t been intimate with each other – really, they weren’t even a couple yet. They were going on dates, holding hands and occasionally pecking each other’s foreheads or cheeks. But that was that. Jungwoo smiled and said “baby?”, which made Kun blush. He was about to apologize, when Jungwoo got up and said “I’ll be right back, honey.”

The second time was when Kun finally smiled. A real smile that reached his eyes. Jungwoo said something stupid and Kun smiled like this, and he felt it. He felt his eyes crinkle and he saw Jungwoo look at him with a fond smile, and even if it stayed unspoken between the two, they knew it was something that should be remembered.

The third time felt really cliché to Kun. Jungwoo and him were walking down Han river because it was a rather hot day for spring, and Jungwoo stumbled upon a tree root. He was about to fall but Kun caught him in his arms. Jungwoo was bent down, their faces close, and Kun leaned down to kiss him. It was just a peck, but it was their first real kiss. It didn’t last long because the position was uncomfortable, but they both blushed afterwards. Jungwoo was really sweet to Kun, and they were slowly building their relationship. It wasn’t rushed, and Kun could feel himself grow confident with Jungwoo. 

When may came, Kun had to talk to his parents. To tell them that finally he wasn’t coming back. He asked Jungwoo to be close to him, because it felt safer to do it with him. He had been really scared for a few days, always pushing this task to the day after because it stressed him way too much, until he realized that he couldn’t procrastinate any longer. Turns out, they didn’t care. They told him it was good for him to stay abroad, simply saying they hope he was doing well in Korea and that they would send him money. He felt sad, because everything had been so much better for him these past weeks, and now everything crumbled down, because his parents didn’t care about him. And he wondered if they wouldn’t disinherit him when they heard about Jungwoo.  
His therapist and Jungwoo helped him understand that things like that shouldn’t matter. Well, not that they shouldn’t matter, but that they shouldn’t make Kun so sad and insecure. Jungwoo loved him – he didn’t know that yet, because they hadn’t confessed to each other – but it should make up for the lack of parental love. And they both encouraged Kun to make friends, to go out sometimes and talk to more people, which he tried to do, with Jungwoo at first, since he was a pillar to him, and then he tried without Jungwoo.

In June, Kun decided to surprise Jungwoo and to pay for a small trip for the two of them. Since Jungwoo was struggling with money, he knew that Jungwoo could never travel. He didn’t go all out, instead settling down for a small trip to Jeju Island, because Jungwoo once told him he wanted to go there. 

They went there mid-july and visited everything they could. One night, they were seated at some restaurant’s table, and Kun felt comfortable. He always wanted to feel this way. So he confessed. He confessed his love for Jungwoo, and how everything felt so easy for him when he was with Jungwoo, and he said that he would always try to be a better person for the two of them, without ever considering Jungwoo as won over. 

That touched Jungwoo, who kissed Kun – again, a simple peck, as they were still in public. And he confessed too, saying that he had never been happier in his life. And after Kun payed for the food, they went to walk around the port, they were holding hands and talking about small stuff, when Jungwoo came to a halt. He said: “Can I kiss you?” and Kun smiled and replied, “I’d love to”.

**Author's Note:**

> ps: stan seven o'clock!


End file.
